Bipolar Affirmation

Red water - yellow blood,
Reflections of warped mind - mud,
Shadows in my mind's eye,
Who and what and where am I?

Tripping over - falling slowly,
In this world I feel so lonely,
In this void that I call home,
Idiots usurp the throne.

Where'm I going - where've I been,
All the things I've done and seen,
Have left me feeling old and empty,
Still trying to find that land of plenty.

Marooned in a rudderless boat,
Blind madmen keep us afloat,
I know what's right but I'm not in control,
I'll surely die in this wet black hole.

Moving down this bottomless pit,
I think I'm alive but I feel shit,
My eyes are open but don't want to see,
The so-called friends that claim to love me.

Distant now, the end is near,
My friends are gone although they're here,
Through their eyes at last I see,
The colour of their gross insincerity.

Embryos for blackmail, access to gwat,
One by one into the trap,
I've gotta hold out, I must be strong,
Those pale reflections will see they're wrong.

Leave me, leave me, I'm going down.
At last I'll wear my thorn of crowns,
I am different - I am me,
Without a doubt the superior species.

Fuck you all!


A defiant piece flicking the bird at the world...and quite rightly too! ;-) The first verse I had in my head since "naaing beat" (i.e. standing guard) in the freezing winter of 1979 during my two years of conscription. The rest came to me in an amazing post-coital flash of elucidation at 03h00 on Sunday, June 14, 1992, exactly 24 months after my father's funeral. I wrote this in the half-light still lying in bed and with my girlfriend curled up behind me. One of my unforgettable memories of Pretoria, South Africa, reflecting the politics of the day, my disillusion with the world and my friends (who were all getting married) and my own paranoia and insecurity.

Cheers MAlfaRK ©